In a recent post, I alluded to “a somewhat complicated sequence of events” that would “keep us busy until the end of November” and that had begun that week with the arrival of a teen-aged granddaughter and her family dog. The plan was that while our daughter and son-in-law were travelling, the teen and the dog would stay with us, but that the teen would fly to Rome with her grandfather where they’d stay in an apartment we’ve rented and where I’ll join Pater later. She’d have a bit more than a week before her parents joined her, and she’d fly home with them a few days later.
The best-laid plans, as they say. . .
Because Strikes! The bane of the contemporary traveller. . . and I say this as one who is consistently supportive of labour organization and the right to strike. Nor do I see a contradiction here — supporting a principle often comes at personal cost, no? I hardly think my support of labour’s rights extinguishes my own right to complain when my careful plans are disrupted. . .
Pater aka Granddad had to be in Rome to meet up and make arrangements with our landlady, so we applied for a refund for the canceled flight and re-booked on another airline for two days after the original departure. The teen’s arrangements, however, were more complicated: a minor travelling one-way with one relative and back with parents couldn’t be accommodated on two separate airlines (for, essentially, good reasons) and losing even two or three days made the trip too short, especially given a nine-hour time difference. . .
My own flight to join Pater isn’t until the end of the month, so I’d already agreed to have the dog here. Now I had a disappointed teen as well. But a disappointed teen who rallied impressively and who has also been willing to binge-watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer with me, something I’ve been wanting to do with her ever since she hit 14. . .
It’s been a joy and a privilege to have her here, and having the dog has kept my daily step count consistently above 10,000 paces. But I don’t mind admitting that in the presence of house guests, I’ve defaulted to putting most of my own priorities — and, especially, creative activities including this blog –on hold. I’ve got a good swath of solitude ahead of me in July, here, and in August, in Rome (more on that later), so I’ll catch up then. but for now, any solitary time will be used for sleep . . .
Exceptions? Well, I still try to dress with some creativity (and with an eye to putting a travel carry-on wardrobe together, seeing what will work in some serious heat!). This linen dress is a contender and I like it with the white Adidas . . . but realistically, I’m pretty sure that the only footwear my feet can stand to walk in when the temperature is over 22C would be Birkenstocks. . . (Note to self: my Birks are pretty much thrashed and need to be replaced pronto!)
I’ve also continued to make time for my sketch journal — and have been motivated to do this by a new friend. We met in that Lisbon workshop, found out we live in almost adjoining neighbourhoods and have been meeting at least weekly to sketch. (Yes, this information will probably be repeated when I finally write that post on friendships after Big Moves and Retirement).
It’s the last day here for The Teen and The Dog, though, and I have an appointment with an audiologist this afternoon. So I will leave you with a few recent sketches from a Sketching Challenge (to sketch every day in July) set by my friend’s sister, whom I also met in that Lisbon workshop and also consider a friend.
What about you, I wonder? How do you respond when plans are upset? Are you finding it tougher or easier to adjust, as the years roll on? I can see arguments for both — life experience tells me this will pass, and I will weather and even benefit from the disruption or change. But there’s also the reality that some of our systems need more attention now — rest, stability, proper nutrition and hydration, for example, can’t be as easily ignored as when we were younger.
Similarly, with our creative or other personal endeavours. We may well have the generosity to put our priorities to the side to accommodate other’s requests, knowing from experience that we have a solid framework to keep our pursuits available for when we’re ready to resume them. But as we age, there’s also a possible insecurity about identity, about our value to others, that might make us too easily give over what makes us happiest in the interest of pleasing family and friends.
I’ll be helping the house guests pack up and move their gear out, and then setting my space back the way it suits me. I’ll look forward to any comments you care to leave, but I may continue to make myself scarce here over the next while. All depends on how this blast of solitude hits — I’m looking forward to finding out!
xo,
f
I love your sketches. How did you learn this wonderful skill?
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I’ve taken a few courses over the last few years, after 50+ years of being convinced I was “just not artistic.” Here’s a post about the weeekend course that got me started, twelve years ago. . .
It’s a shame your granddaughter’s plans fell through – a little life lesson ? But you sound to have enjoyed your time together. Perhaps we expect our travel to go too smoothly these days . We book tickets with specific flight times & our expectations are high – holidays are special , nothing must spoil it . I’m speaking generally of course . When we were stuck in interminable airport queues, coping with delays , diversions & cancellations I would think back to the earlier days of travel . When crossing the Atlantic by boat to sit in a ramshackle horse drawn carriage really tested one’s resilience . It didn’t always help though & quite annoyed my husband ‘ yes but this isn’t the 1880s is it ‘ . Not sure I’d cope so well now . The joys of travel . Enjoy your quiet time before the excitement.
Author
It might be a while before she thinks of the experience gratefully as a little life lesson, but she’s handled it beautifully — and it did give us a chance to deepen our already good relationship.
To be honest, I haven’t expected travel to go too smoothly for a long time — perhaps since I missed a flight home from England when I was 18 (yikes!). Or when our car broke down in 36C heat along the side of a busy highway with two small children in the car as we moved to a new home two days’ drive away. So many strikes, and cancelled flights, and I guess I’d count my stolen bag as a travel misadventure as well. All part of what we take on when we leave on. But yes, when my dad drove my mom, myself (2), my brother (10 months old) across Canada to catch a ride across the Atlantic on a freighter with some passenger accommodation — just so he could introduce his new family to his beloved family in Middlesbrough. My poor mother, green with seasickness all the way . . . And even that was easy compared to so many horrific crossings, some by choice, others by violent coercion. . . It’s definitely all relative!
I thought my mental arithmetic had failed me when I converted 22 C to F, so I checked with Google – can’t imagine the bliss of temperature that cool! At any rate, it sounds like teen grand (grand teen?) has her grandma’s flexibility, well done her. And you of course. The dog was no doubt good with whatever happened as long as walks and treats were involved. We had a “grand dog” for most of June and enjoyed it throughly; it took a week for us to stop suddenly wondering where she was, had she been shut into a room or outside, etc.
Cheers, and thanks for sharing the sketches! Ceci
Author
I’m sure that seems a very moderate, comfortable temperature to those who are used to much higher (are you in the southern US?) . . . But my feet have strong opinions about their temperature range and I tried to respect those.
I would also point out that if you’re in a house of some size, especially if you have A/C, you might be experiencing comfort that I would consider blissful. We’re in a condo with a wall full of windows on both the south and east-facing sides. Unshaded. When the temperatures get over 22C, it quickly hits 28+ inside and can climb from there. Unmitigated, that gets intolerable for me quite quickly.
In recent years, I have experienced many flight delays and snafus like you and your family have just had, most recently on a return flight from Rome in early June. It used to be these problems (weather, crew issues, etc.) were few and far between. In the last year or two very few flights have gone as planned in my own experience. Just wondering as I wrote this how my flight from Oregon to Arizona will go the day after tomorrow!
But it’s one thing to deal with this as adults, another being a young person, or a family traveling with small children! I’m sure you helped your granddaughter make the best of the situation.
We are blessed to get time with grandchildren! And, it does impinge on time for our own creative endeavors. Still, we can carve out that time if we stay committed, barring family emergencies! (Like the one that suddenly had us driving from Corvallis up to Seattle last Friday—our daughter-in-law needed an appendectomy and our son asked for our help with their baby for the first few days post surgery.)
There are times when dressing creatively to please ourselves is the only artistic activity of the day, eh? I love your recent ensembles.
And now, back to my granddaughters!
Cheers,
Linda
Author
Your son and daughter-in-law are so fortunate to be able to get your help. And aren’t we fortunate to be able to help out when needed!
How very disappointing about the cancelled flights, but well done to the teen for being so resilient. I think by this stage I’m more upset by other people’s cancelled travel than I am about my own. Am I the only person in the world never to have watched Buffy?
No summer frocks here – another day of pouring rain and temperatures bumping along at 12C.
How long have you had your Birkenstocks? I had to put out my very first pair 2 years ago, as they had finally demised beyond repair. They were bought in 1990 in Austria, when I was pregnant with my first child. I remember buying them in a medical uniforms specialist shop in Zell am See – at that time they weren’t yet fashionable outside Germany and Austria, and were very much comfort shoes for professionals who spent a long time on their feet.
Author
In my experience, you have ample company in the non-Buffy-watching category. I got hooked by a former colleague, a medievalist who began watching it and went on to write many influential academic articles on the series and, from there, to other works in popular culture. She even convinced me to present a paper or two at conferences and, I had an essay published in a scholarly anthology. Love it when my leisure/entertainment gives me work cred! 😉
This pair of Birkenstocks are only about 6 years old, but in white leather and worn hard and often on city sidewalks, they’ve been looking shabby for some time. My first pair — bought in the early 80s (they must somehow have hit Canada / North America earlier than Scotland — here, they were an integral part of hippie culture) — They were a very homely but practical style, funky perhaps, “jolie laide” would be a stretch — I religiously sealed the cork edges with a coating of rubber cement every few weeks and I replaced the sole enough times that my cobbler fees far outweighed the initial purchase. . . You’ve made me a bit nostalgic. . . My daughter feels the same way, I think, about the (closed toe) Birkenstock clogs that she wore in professional kitchens through her first career. . .
I wonder if you’ll find your replacement pair lasts anywhere near as long as the impressive 30+ years of the first — the soles are made of a much softer material now, I think. . .
I have reached the stage with travelling when I never expect things to go according to plan. Here in the UK our rail system (extensive) has been impacted by union disputes, lack of staff, damaged power lines and yesterday, much to my surprise, a sinkhole opening up in a long tunnel! Fortunately not on my line but it delayed many, many trains at a particularly busy time. These days, as I approach Kings Cross to take a train home, I have stopped praying for good luck and simply accept that delays and cancellations are likely, not possible. And flying…the less said the better. Weather, delays…it all adds to the anxiety. However, I travel in hope more often than not. Do not start me on driving on the motorways. We are staying home for the forseeable future and I am quite resigned to that.
Author
Those sinkholes! They’re appearing with frightening frequency these days.
I must say that if it weren’t for the family who chose to live abroad (! scowl !) I could see myself settling in to a pleasant and more manageable series of adventures right at home. For now, I make the most out of my “opportunity” to travel and work on smiling through the travails. The week or two before leaving (as in, right now!) are always toughest as I can feel my mental and emotional heels dragging . . . Once I’m launched, I’m okay-ish 😉
I am so,so sorry,Frances! What a disappointment it must have been! And ,it seems,as I hear,that changing flights schedules is more common now than it was before. Or selling more tickets than there are seats…..
At the moment,I don’t travel a lot,only to Vienna if I can-my mother can’t be alone at home
But,it is as it is ….plans change…
Love,love your dress! Looking forward to hear about your plans and future adventures
We have 35°C today in Zagreb,very hot,wide dress and open sandals for me
Dottoressa
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Yes! The seemingly arbitrary changes to a carefully chosen flight’s schedule (our upcoming flight back has been moved ahead one day) and the sale of more tickets than seats (my daughter and SIL arrived at the gate for a connecting flight with their tickets in hand only to be told that there were no seats left and they’d have to spend the night in a hotel and take an early flight the next day. . . )
Some day I really need to visit your beloved Vienna . . .
35C Yikes! and I believe it’s about the same in Rome which I’m trying to figure out how to pack for. Note to self: Follow K’s example: wide (loose!) dress and open sandals!
So sorry about the canceled plans. I am planning a vacation next week with daughter and her husband. we will be driving so will not have to rely on schedules or cancellations but, and perhaps this sounds silly, my cat who is older seems not to be doing well so there is that concern. And a lovely dress Frances.
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Doesn’t sound silly at all — finding good care for our animal friends while we’re away isn’t always easy, and our peace of mind is affected, obviously, if we worry their health will suffer in our absence.
But how nice to have a vacation with your loved ones and be able to set your own pace. . . Enjoy!
I am in Puglia right now. We have been having temperatures of about 33C for several days. I am all with dottoressa: wide dresses, open sandals (no Birkenstocks, for political reasons), and a HAT! Also a long siesta and no gardening after 7am or before 7pm. Next week I am going home, and I am quite looking forward to a bit of wet German summer 😉
Birkenstocks – there was a good show on recently re the company and how people send them in to be repaired – people who’ve had their’s for many many years. Surprising how they could renew them. But of course shipping costs would be high.
Lucky me – 2 x I could not check in online with an airline- sent e-mail complaint – got $300 credit for a future flight and then 10% off another time.
Enjoy your summer days in Vancouver. Nice time you had with the granddaughter – furthering your close bond.
Author
Whoa! Good for you for following through with an email — that’s a worthwhile credit!
I’ve jumped back in time, reading your latest post before this one. You’re now packing for the trip you mention here and your guests have departed. It sounds like you and your granddaughter were remarkably flexible and had a wonderful time together (dog too). Flying has become so challenging.
Your sketches are wonderful. I love the red truck and the faces on the wall behind the truck.
Did the linen dress make the cut for being packed? It looks so comfortable and has a very cheerful design. I’d want to live in it.
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Sadly, that dress will be staying home — I’ve kept my packing much more neutral this time, given the constraints of a longer (season-spanning) time period and a small case (carry-on size that I will check for flight but have to manage on trains).