This is a Three-Part Post, so pace yourself, readers 😉
Part the First, three viewing recommendations:
1. On Netflix, the Oscar-winning Wes Anderson short film The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar is a witty, whimsical, and wondrous adaptation of Roald Dahl’s short story of the same title. The usual gorgeous Wes Anderson sets and playfulness (all kinds of meta!) and fine performances by Richard Ayoade, Benedict Cumberbatch, Ralph Fiennes, Ben Kingsley, and Dev Patel.
2. Also on Netflix, I’ve just finished watching the eight-episode adaptation of Tembi Locke’s From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home (which I read, and mentioned in this post (it’s #63, scroll down). Drool-worthy armchair travel (and when I say drool, I should clarify that besides the scenery, there’s the added pleasure of an Italian chef as one of the main characters); there’s a deliciously romantic courtship; then the struggle against family expectation, rejection; the challenge of a move to California.
And that’s only the the first four or five episodes. For the remainder, you will have occasional recourse to a box of Kleenex — Tembi’s memoir tells of their marriage, their parenting, and then, tragically, of Lino’s journey with cancer. At the risk of sounding trite, I will say that it’s inspiring and redemptive enough to compensate for the soaking hankies. Zoe Saldana is very good in the main role, and there are many other enjoyable performances (the roles of the various mothers, especially). Also, if you have some Italian, there’s enough spoken throughout to satisfy your craving to hear the language (all subtitled, of course, so don’t worry if Italian’s not in your toolbox).
3. Paul’s looking forward to seeing Dune: Part Two, and we’ll do that eventually (although, honestly, I’d prefer to wait and see it at home where we can break up its length!). But I figure that’s going to run for a while yet at theatres, whereas the Wim Wenders’ film Perfect Days will likely be gone more quickly. So I booked online tickets last week, and made a reservation for (early!) dinner before the show — and we both enjoyed it very much. It’s what you might call an “artsy” film, but what a gem. The action is slow, gentle, repetitive, with small narrative arcs. . . quotidian, seemingly simple events that suggest quiet drama, relationships glimpsed through deft sketches.
A middle-aged Tokyo Toilets cleaner who finds joy in working scrupulously, in observing and nurturing trees, in choosing books carefully and reading them thoughtfully, in listening to an obviously curated selection of cassette tapes (Lou Reed, Patti Smith, Otis Redding, the Stones).
I’ve never been to Japan and was impressed by the cinematography throughout — the contrasts between interiors and exteriors, between densely filled urban space and the expansiveness found in a grove of trees in a small urban park. And the final scene, featuring the actor Kôji Yakusho’s face moving through a range of emotions as he drives through the city, listening to his music (the soundtrack of the film is so good!)
Part the Second: Wardrobe Care
I’m currently sorting my wardrobe as I pack for an upcoming trip (yes, more on that soon) and try to shift winter garments into their storage place (under the bed, primarily). Our weather’s still transitional enough that I continue to want something cozy, mornings and evenings at least, but when I get home in early May, I’ll be reaching for linen and cotton more than for wool.
So I’m washing two woolie garments a day in Eucalan (drying them flat takes up too much of our limited urban condo real estate to do more) and muttering anti-moth spells as I tuck them into their bins. . .
And I’m reminded of my promise to share one more Mending Project — albeit one that was not a moth collaboration. Instead, my elbows are to blame for the drastic thinning of this 5-year-old Vince turtleneck. It’s a lovely plush cashmere, but I was shocked to realize that the elbows had almost worn through in spots.
You might already have seen my Instagram post briefly describing my process for this repair — basically, I snipped the worn section out with scissors, tucked a patch of purple cashmere (harvested from an old, old scarf) underneath the hole, stitched it in place and then embellished and reinforced the whole area, using a black-and-white tweed sock yarn, in a sashiko-inspired stitching style
What you won’t have seen on Instagram are any photos of the sweater being worn, elbows displayed.
Because that is a very awkward photo to manage. . . and while you’re an understanding crew here, my IG account is open to the world.
See what I mean?
and
I did try to get Paul to take some photos from behind me, with my elbows in a more natural position. But when he passed me back my iphone, I saw a series of photos of my, well, my backside. . . .photos taken by a loving but uncritical eye. The best kind of eye for a husband to have, perhaps, but not for a photographer. . .
and
Part the Third: More Quotations on Getting/Being Old
I might be stretching your patience or attention span too much with this addition, so I’m going to limit how much I’ll share with you today and continue in an upcoming post. I’ve been reading American artist Anne Truitt’s posthumously published Yield: The Journey of an Artist, which comprises journals she kept from Winter 2001 to Spring 2002 (she was born in 1921; died in 2004). It’s a wonderful little book to dip in and out of — and I’ve resolved to go back and read her earlier works soon.
And as I read, I keep coming across passages that seem relevant to our recent and ongoing conversation about ageing. Here are a few short passages to whet your appetite:
March 24
I find I like being eighty. I like the number 80: the symbol of eternity turned sideways next to the symbol of never-beginning, never-ending wholeness.
Eight decades under my feet lifting me up so I see farther backwards and farther forwards.
I feel patient. Looking out from here I may begin to think, “Oh, that’s how that happened.”
Yield: The Journal of an Artist, Anne Truitt, Yale UP, New Haven, 2022. p. 29
And shortly after this upbeat assessment, we read the entry for March 28th:
I lifted a basket of laundry about ten days ago and even as I did so–had done so–realized that it was heavier than I had thought. I felt something go wrong in my back right next to my spinal column, low down on the right-hand side, and instantly decided to act as if nothing had happened. Sometimes that works, but not this time.
Yield, Anne Truitt, p. 30
on April 27th, she returns home to DC after a visit to New York City and records a “Decrease in physical stamina–cancelled Maine and Massachusetts.” A few days later, May 1st, she writes about being “caught in an eddy [going] round and round . . . like Eeyore when he slipped into the river and just revolved there with his four feet stuck up into the air.” She feel stuck and exhausted and, she writes, “as always, I retreat into my core and there I find that I am very, very tired and that my body hurts me all the time. I am going to the doctor tomorrow morning.”
And there I will stop, having set the scene for a confrontation Truitt has with herself, her health, her need for independence, and her ambitions for the work she still wants to do. I hope you might find something interesting and relevant, as I do, even in these few short entries.
As always, I welcome your comments or your friendly wave in this direction. Perhaps you’ve seen the TV series or films I’ve recommended and want to add your thoughts (you can disagree with me, of course; I know you’ll do so politely 😉 — Or perhaps you have your own viewing recommendations to share. And if you’ve long known Truitt’s writing and her art — maybe you’ve been fortunate enough to see her sculptures “in person.” — I’m envious and would be keen to hear your impressions.
That’s all for now,
xo,
f
Finally, I am caught up with many tasks, and I have read your post just after it arrived in my inbox! As always, I find what you write about to be so engaging of both mind and heart. And I love that you enjoy the reactions of your readers. So here are mine for today:
First, the viewing recommendations. The Henry Sugar story as interpreted by Netflix was definitely something my husband and I enjoyed, though definitely a bit weird, eh? I enjoy seeing Benedict Cumberbatch in anything!
Second, I love the visible mending work. I have been trying to imagine what I have that needs this. In the past few years I have reignited my lifelong love of embroidery, getting particularly into the genre of “threadpainting”. . . But I keep thinking I will do some sashiko at some point. We actually had booked a spring trip to Japan with some dear friends in the fall of 2019–and then, the pandemic hit, and it seems that ship has sailed for us. . . Still, I am so drawn to that embroidery work.
Third, the writing of Anne Truit has me intrigued. I will try to see if I can find that book. Thank you as always for sharing such rich words.
Author
Thanks for sharing your reactions, Linda!
Yes, that little film was different from the usual fare — whimsical and refreshing and I’m with you on Benedict Cumberbatch having been the big attraction for me. But also Wes Anderson’s direction. . . apparently there are / will be others in this Roald Dahl short-film series he’s doing. I’ll be watching for those.
I’m impressed that you’ve been “threadpainting” — it’s been so satisfying to see a resurgence of interest in embroidery this last decade or so.
And if you find Truit’s book, I hope you enjoy it.
I’ve not come across Anne Truitt but you’ve made me want to read more of her work .We need more wise old people in our lives . Thanks for the film recommendations too .I like films that get me thinking . Not action packed adventures . So I have my eye on Perfect Days . One of my favourite actors is Timothy Spall who usually plays quirky but very real characters. I’d say he is the opposite of a Hollywood glamour boy . He was excellent in Turner also Mrs Lowry & Son but one we watched recently was The Last Bus . He plays a man coming to terms with the death of his wife by travelling the length of Britain , back to their old home , by local bus services . Really good . Then there’s Sheila Hancock in Edie , climbing a mountain in old age . I could see you doing that !
Author
Yes, we do need more wise old people to show us the way — ’cause we’re going to have to be the wise old people very soon! 😉
Thanks for those film recommendations — I’ll see if I can track them down.
Also thanks for the vote of confidence re the mountain climbing — if only I weren’t so queasy about heights!
Re the viewing, you had me at Benedict Cumberbatch but all your recommendations sound wonderful and very appealing, thank you! I am so tired of predicable films full of action and no soul. My husband saw Dune at the cinema yesterday and he enjoyed it. I haven’t seen part 1 so I stayed home and watched Northanger Abbey, a 2007 version starring Felicity Jones and a young Carey Mulligan. It was very enjoyable and made me keen to reread my least favourite Austen novel. I always thought the heroine silly but she’s really just very young.
I laughed loudly at your observations about husbands, photographers and uncritical eyes. And I’m full of admiration at your clever mending.
I quickly Googled Anne Truitt and was bowled over by some her sculptures – bold, geometric and beautifully coloured, while others are sinuous and darkly metallic. Her art form is very physical and may have led to some of the aches and pains she describes. Her writing seems spare and striking, like her sculptures. I look forward to your further exploration of her work.
Author
Another BC fan!
I haven’t seen the Northanger Abbey adaptation and I’ve never read the novel (but I like Carey Mulligan as actor very much)
I did the same for Truitt’s work (amazing to have that capability at our fingertips, isn’t it? Once that would have required at least a trip to the library). My response to it was similar to yours — very simple, striking, and strong — and those qualities comes through in her writing as well.
Now I come to think of it, the only things I’ve watched on Netflix have been The Crown and 10 Pour Cent. We haven’t watched the latest series of The Crown, because we got fed up with their tabloidisation of the Royal Family. Yes, they’ve had tabloid-worthy lives, and I’m no ardent royalist (tho did feel genuine sorrow at the death of the Queen), but coming up to date with recent history involvng people still alive, just feels too intrusive to this Brit. And, most of all, I haven’t forgiven them for having the young Queen tend roses in full bloom outside at Balmoral in the depth of the Scottish winter! As for Roald Dahl, I may be the only person on the planet who truly – truly – can’t stand anything he has produced. I might cast a look at From Scratch, but we have been talking about cancelling our Netflix subscription. We’ve been re-watching the Foyle’s War series on ITVX, and have been bombarded in the ad breaks by Netflix ads for Scoop, about Prince Andrew. Again, it just seems tabloid sensationalism – goodness knows the reality is desperate and sensational enough. Our son has narrated Dune Two to me, which will suffice! Most of my TV watching at the moment is the free European channel Arte, which is excellent. Plus La Meilleure Boulangerie de France on YouTube…just to raise the intellectual level.
Your mending is artistic and fun, and without denigrating your sewing expertise, looks about the level I could manage. Nothing has gone at the elbows for the moment, perhaps because in retirement I’m no longer leaning on desks so much.
I may put off delving into Anne Truitt, as I’m feeling physiologically and psychologically challenged after cataract surgery. Everyone I know who has had it is an “oldie”, and they’ve spoken blithely about it being nothing, and how their eyesight was perfect and they were back doing goodness knows what soon after. This has not been my experience. For the moment sitting tight and hoping for improvement. Being grounded, I’ll look forward all the more to your travel “récits”.
You are not alone, I have always loathed all of Ronald Dahl’s work. Fortunately my children, who liked his books more than I did, were never huge fans. Also nothing I’ve ever read about the man has encouraged me to reconsider the books.
Also agree with your characterisation of the later series of the Crown. The earlier series were brave in their storytelling. I’m sure the involvement of Edward the abdicator with the Nazis came as a big surprise for many people! Lady Di endlessly on a yacht was poor fare by comparison.
There is a comfort in knowing I’m not alone – it seems obligatory to like Roald Dahl! My children didn’t like his books at all. I don’t think I carried out negative propaganda. I do remember, when they were older and more able to counter with their own views, sharing my opinion that the Harry Potter books were not great literature!
Author
I’m sorry to hear your cataract surgery has been so tough for you. May better healing begin soon.
You are not alone in needing cataract surgery at a relatively young age. My doctor said that is common for people who are very short-sighted, as I was. Sitting tight and hoping for improvement often bring the desired results and I hope that will be your experience too.
Thank you for recommendations-I don’t watch Netflix (or anything ) a lot,so sporadic Linley, Lewis or Vera episodes on plain tv (but watched the next day)very quickly complete my weeks plan . But,I’ll look for these
Your stiching is so charming. I didn’t realize for a long time that two of my sweaters were completely worn on elbows and was happily wearing them all the time. Now,they have plain patches-I’m not so artistic
Happy travel plans!
Dottoressa
Author
I think you would enjoy the Wes Anderson film — delightfully quirky! And I’m sure you’d love Perfect Days as much as we did, but I’m not sure how likely it is to get to your cinemas.
Ha! That’s what happened with this sweater of mine and one more — I’m glad you got patches on yours before they wore through!
And thanks re the travel planning 😉
I thought about watching From Scratch but was worried I might lose my excuse that screen time is considered ‘language practice’. Maybe I’ll give it a try (and also…I had a fit of post-travel restlessness a couple of days ago and booked a place in Sicily for next spring…it helps to know it’s there…)
I like the visible mending. I mostly wear my clothes out, but something puzzles me…what is the best thing to do with worn-out cotton, linen, wool, etc. clothes? (No, Georgia, the answer is not put them in a box until a solution magically presents itself.) I mean, beyond donation and there is a limit to how many cleaning rags one needs. There is textile recycling but everything is mixed together and that partially eliminates the benefit of wearing natural fibres doesn’t it? Where is our textile composting? And sending it far away is of course not the answer. Must do research.
And no, the conflict between wanting to find a way to ethically dispose of a t-shirt and on the other hand fly halfway around the world is not lost on me. Sigh.
Author
Ha! I use that same excuse — not only for screen time but also for reading mysteries in French or Italian (I don’t bother making excuses for the English ones 😉 . . . My other excuse is knitting time, so I’m all set. . .
My grandma used to make rag rugs and quilts with her worn-out garments — I remember the “rag and bone” man that used to drive his horse and cart along my other (my English) grandma’s street — presumably the rags collected that way were recycled into components for some industrial use — perhaps pulp and paper? filler for whatever?
Your last paragraph — yep, but we do what we can. If we stopped ourselves at logic, we’d be totally defeated, right?
As I read about the memoir by Anne Truitt, I’m reminded that I never did order the Diana Athill book from the library that I was going to order when you wrote about her thoughts on aging. (Her article about going into a care home was so good.) I must remedy that. But I think in the end I will buy her memoir (or maybe all of them…ha) instead of borrowing it. I think I might like to see it on my shelf beside the one you so kindly sent me about her trip to Florence.
Hope your travels are good. Happy packing. Maybe this fall, I will revisit my plan to go west that I abandoned in 2020. And we can finally meet up in person again. It’s been eight years since that May lunch. xox
Author
I’ll admit that I do enjoy dipping into the Athill books I have on my shelf — although I have a library just ’round the corner that can bring them in for me quite quickly.
I was thinking that the other day — eight years! (that May was so hot already in Ottawa!) Would be great if you can make it out here — I have some fall travel planned but if you get to making plans, we could compare dates. Oooh, what a lot of chatting we will do!
Hello Frances,
Think I may be the only person in the Western world, in London and in Maine, that does not have Neflix. No reason, really, other than one more subscription and one more thing to twiddle and fiddle with, and I’d rather listen to podcasts while I do physical work for my business, or exercise-to soothe, educate, make me laugh as I work or walk. But, I so appreciate knowing what docs and series and movies people are watching on Netflix so, if I take the plunge and get Netflix,
I will have weeks of “TV homework” (as my sister, mother and I call it), to indulge in!
Presently I am in Maine working, and resuming the endless rotation and clearing out of clothes, household possessions to take to charity shops, or repurpose. I am a great believer in mending- everything. A sad day when my Maine cobbler, ( who said he would retire on the amount of mending and re-mending of shoe and boots I brought him through the years). Maybe he is living in a cottage overlooking the ocean because of my shoes and boots?!
Mending clothes by hand is a task I actually look forward to, too. Your visible mending with yarn adds a charming touch.
Yesterday, (with a brewing 3 day nor’easter headed our way)** while walking in my small Maine town center, I came across 2 teenage girls with shovels in their hands digging away at a small strip of land nestled between 2 parking lots. They had their car doors flung open, while the wind was whipping around, with their sound system turned up to max, blasting reggae and “making a lily garden”. The sight and sound of them filled me up, turning my heavy thoughts related to my reality of supporting my best friend who has lost 2 sisters, who were quite young, within three very recent weeks. They were so hopeful, those girls.
**You may remember me saying that my mother, who lives next to me in Maine, has routinely blamed any bad weather and storms on ” a Canadian cold front”. Everything! All the fault of those Canadian cold fronts. Think she has accepted, for this pending storm, that it started in Southern California and is blasting its way across the country, causing havoc as it goes. So, for once, the blame does not fall on Canada’s shoulders. I bet you are relieved. x
A. in London ( but in Maine for a bit)
Author
Curious to know if you have other subscription services or just stay away from the screen.
I lost a trusted cobbler during the Covid lockdowns — she had a shop just across the street but the landlord wouldn’t give her a break on the rent (Vancouver real estate is disproportionately pricey!) and with no business for months . . . I’m delighted to have found a new one and have adjusted to being patient with the long waits.
Thank you for that vignette of the two teenaged girls — I love that positive energy!
Does your mother know the satirical song “Blame Canada”? From the 1999 animated film (which I didn’t see, nor have I watched the TV series) South Park. . . I won’t take her weather blame personally, since she’s talking about a Canada the better part of a continent away from mine 😉
Frances, your question to A. in London made me take stock of what we have and rudely jump in before A. has replied! But my wonky eye is feeling halfway decent right now so I take the good moments when I can. We only have Netflix because our adult children set us up with it so that we could watch things together when they were home. I think that really means so that they could watch things they like. We do have Amazon Prime, but we got it for the free postal delivery. I have about 6 films that I’ve bought on that and which I rewatch, but it’s not something I turn to frequently. Between our terrestrial channels BBC and ITV there are perhaps 3 things we watch on catch up between us, and the only live terrestrial TV I watch is Gardener’s World. It means I don’t have a clue who current famous people are. It was interesting to read the latest national report on babies’ first names and see that the top boy’s name in Scotland in 2023 was Luca, potentially because of a character in a Disney film and a contestant on Love Island…https://www.nrscotland.gov.uk/files//statistics/babies-names/23/babies-first-names-23-report.pdf
Thank you, Mater, for recommending Annie Truit’s writing. I’ll be on it, as the saying goes. And I’m much admiring your excellent mending art; that sweater is improved!
Author
You’re very welcome! And thank you for the mending admiration — very encouraging.
I love the visible mending on that sweater – I think it looks even more charming than a plain black sweater!
Author
Thank you! I’m quite pleased with it and curious to see how it changes the way I wear it.
Thank you for this three part post. I always write down your book and TV viewing suggestions. I just finished watching on Netflix, Forgotten Love, a Polish movie with a somewhat maudlin title but it is perfectly charming and well written and acted. A lucky find while scrolling through the endless selections.
Being a bit younger then Anne Truitt I will look into her book. Loosing one’s independence as one ages is scary but very real. And I’m not sure how to navigate that or if it is rationally possible to plan for those unforeseeable changes. I look forward to further posts and comments on this.
Author
We watched that movie as well — charming indeed! A delightful period piece with some unexpected turns.
Yes, losing independence is one of the biggest fears, and I’m like you in not knowing how possible it is to plan for it, but also wanting to see how others have handled that fear.
Bite the bullet and see Dune 2 on the big screen. It is well worth foregoing the drink at the theatre!
Author
We’re going to see it this evening! (we never buy snacks or drinks at the theatre 😉
Not even a a choc-top – a chocolate coated, vanilla ice cream in a cone, and an Aussie tradition at the cinema?
I have been thinking lately that I may have to break down and order a streaming service, possibly Netflix. So far I have been content to watch what is on regular TV, mostly public Television and British or now Australian productions. And I watch to much political news for my own good. I have mixed feelings about reading about someone my own age struggling with the debilitation of aging. A bit scary. this year in particular a few of my college classmates have experienced some serious health concerns. On a more positive note. The trip to the MOMA was wonderful and I was proud of myself to do all that walking the day included.
Author
So hard to choose now, between the various streaming services, but I’ll admit I scarcely watch anything on regular TV anymore.
I understand the mixed feelings about such reading . . .
Very pleased your trip to MOMA went well — and you should feel proud! Yes!
Dear Frances, your visible mendig is a motivation to tackle my cahmere sweaters on which the moths have feasted and left five (!) of them with a lot of holes. So I am thinking of sacrificing one of them to mend the others. But maybe this is a task for october :). Your thoughts on ageing are interesting, although in my mid fifties I feel quite far avay still. But reading them helps to understand my parents and my MIL, who are past eighty now and still quite active, from my poitnt of view. Athough it may well be different for them from the inside. And als already said, you are quite a role model from the point where I stand!
Author
Your mending plan makes sense (darn moths!) . . . even the procrastination 😉
I haven’t had a Netflix subscription for quite a few years so can’t add any recommendations (although I do enjoy hearing about worthwhile viewing!)
I absolutely love your visible mending! It’s so beautiful! I have a grey cashmere jumper that I’ve had for 15 years- with no holes yet- and now I’m itching to add some visible mending!
I haven’t heard of Anne Truitt so looked at some of her artworks online. For me, it may be one of those cases where you need to see it IRL. I was really moved by her writing.
Author
Ha! I envy your problem of having no moth holes to mend 😉
Yes, from what I’ve read in her writing, there is a precision in the choice of colours that would be very difficult to capture or to appreciate on screen.
My mother told me that when she turned eighty she felt as though she had really slowed down. She had always been a very active person and a fast walker. It was with a touch of sadness that she noted her slowing down. From then on, there was a marked decline in her mental and physical state. She started having problems negotiating stairs, with walking and eventually with both sitting down and getting up from a chair. She broke her pelvis in a fall and was never the same again. The body breaks down whether we stay active or not.
Hi Frances. You’ve offered up so many things to watch, read, and contemplate. Thank you.
I haven’t watched any of the movies or television series that you wrote about. Wes Anderson’s work is charming. I’ll add the Dahl film to my list. From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home also sounds great. Perhaps I will read the books first. It is on my TBR list now. I liked the first couple of Dune books, but haven’t seen the movies.
I recently watched the series One Day and enjoyed it. Went to the movies for the first time since Covid and saw The Holdovers, which I really liked. Good acting.
The repairs on your sweater are wonderful. I saw the work on Instagram and am happy to see the whole sweater. Clever work.
While I would not have been able to associate Anne Truitt with her art, I believe that I have seen some of her work. I like it. When I googled her, there were two photos of her: one when she is quite young and another of her when she is older. It was an instant reminder of how we age — of course, that is exactly the subject you were writing about. My husband retired this week and the lead up to the decision was our own aging and the desire to use some of our remaining active years being active! One can think about all of the exciting times in the immediate future and try not to look too far ahead. However, reading about others’ experiences with aging can possibly help prepare?
I lifted a laundry basket today and I’m now thinking about the possibility that such an ordinary task can lead to pulled muscles and pain. Groan.