Over a week since I last published a post — credit for the delay goes mainly to a Five and an Eight whose parents took a well-deserved break last week. We septuagenarians boarded the ferry last Tuesday, ready to take over Wednesday morning; I drove home by myself Sunday afternoon so that I could attend a friend’s 75th birthday dinner. Don’t worry, I left Granddad behind to hand over kids and keys later that evening, and he got a ride to the ferry the next day, took the bus home from it on this side.
I mention the transit details because they forced both of us to do something new, probably a good thing for 70-somethings. At least, I’ve driven myself to and from that ferry before, but not for years, and I had to conquer some small anxieties. Last time I did that route solo, our car was probably only 15 or so years old; it’s 22 now, and I was quietly apprehensive when I turned the key in the ignition as cars in my lane began to disembark! But it started faithfully and all went well, even when I got slightly rattled at having chosen a different exit on the 35-kilometre drive home . . . Yes, I had to cover quite a few kilometres before I found a turn-off where I could check my route; I also added a navigator at that point, that reassuring automated voice who piped directions at me from phone to hearing aids.
Then yesterday, Paul found that while taking the bus — much cheaper than private car! — is slower than driving one’s car, it’s also much less expensive and has the benefit of not requiring any attention other than watching for the right stop.
I could have found time to put a post together while the grandkids were at school / daycare, it’s true, but after I’d supervised hair-brushing and outfit-choosing and breakfast-eating;
after I’d filled the lunch and snack boxes with the appropriate combinations (a salty, a sweet, no peanuts anywhere, raw fruit, raw veggies, this one a jam sandwich, that one leftover pasta, separate containers for the lunches and for the snacks x2 kids!) and made sure the water bottles were clean and topped up;
after I’d checked the list to see if it was a Water Day at after-school care (pack towel and change of clothes) or Hot Lunch Day (still pack snacks but lunch for only one kiddo); after I’d remembered to pack the Five’s backpack with the old soccer ball that he liked to kick around “with the big kids,” thus easing the morning’s transition into daycare . . . . Yes, after all that, after I came inside from waving them all off as Paul backed the car out of the driveway in ample time for a relaxed start to their school day . . . I did think about you, and about writing a post . . .
Instead, I scooped some muesli into a bowl, added Greek yoghurt and a handful of frozen blueberries, made myself a cup of tea, and opened Ann Cleeves’ The Long Call (first in her Matthew Venn series, new to me and just what I needed). As the kids say, #sorrynotsorry! If a Nana wants to be her best self when the kids get home (more snacks, then dinner, then fending off requests for screentime, and diverting energy to imaginative and active play that’s either Not Too Noisy . . . or is OUTdoors!), then said Nana needs to rest when she can.
I marvelled at what the parents do, day in and day out — all the driving and the feeding and the packing and the gently diverting; the refereeing and the cleaning (dishes and laundry dirty themselves with shocking regularity) and the schedule-keeping. All in addition to their paid work, of course, and all that’s happening in their own and in the family’s social and recreational lives.
I marvel that I did all this myself once. The energy I had! I have less now (yet still much enthusiasm for myriad activities), and thus have to be wise about using it. So last week I walked fewer kilometres, skipped weight training, managed no yoga (despite good intentions) — so as to have time for a particular walk I love through a park that winds up the hill behind our son and daughter-in-law’s place. I saved time and energy, as well, for a bike ride with my husband along a wonderful trail that skirts the water, crosses the city, runs parallel to the highway, then cleverly slips into deeply dappled shade under huge fragrantly verdant trees.
We kept the bike ride to 90 minutes, allowing time for lunch at a restaurant that’s been on our radar for years, a special place nestled at the side of a botanical garden. The garden itself will have to wait until next time because, again, one has to conserve energy. Once upon a time, I would have urged a further distance on the bike path and surrendered afternoon solitude to the garden’s treasures. I’d have called it a worthwhile trade having to then power through school pick-up, after-school transition, dinner, and bedtime wrangling. I could still do that in a pinch, but I would not be my best Nana self at 7:00 a.m. the next day.
I also managed to fit in a long overdue walking-and-talking visit with a friend, some reading, some sketching. I revelled in a special one-on-one bookstore-and teatime outing with an Eight: we walked over 6 kilometres round-trip, and she complained not a whit! Even when the prettily plated “Light Tea” offerings fell short of the delights she’d imagined. The scone, especially, a magical word which was too heavily freighted not to disappoint — thank goodness for the redeeming and undeniable qualities of a lemon curd tart! And the prosaic dependability of the side of fries this indulgent Nana ordered as a compensatory side dish. . .
Watching her carefully choose a book from the well-stocked children’s section of a splendid independent bookstore (and then finish it — an entire “chapter book” — by the next morning, reading on the couch, then outside on the deck, then in her bed, then the livingroom floor) . . .well, let’s just say that Best Nana was gratified I’d saved energy for this special day together.
(Meanwhile, let me assure you, Best Granddad was shopping for groceries, making dinners, chauffeuring, and watching baseball and soccer practice. And managing the Five’s bedtime routine each night while I read to the Eight.)
So when I got home on Sunday with 90 minutes to spare before that birthday dinner, can you guess what I did? You may already have detected my affection for the afternoon nap and a good cup of tea; have no doubt that I indulged! A deposit to the energy bank, I like to think, in advance of a withdrawal soon after. (Learning Lessons from a Squirrel, I could also call this — see top photo!)
Yesterday, a sunny but not-too-hot day (high of 21C), I walked 9 kilometres (round trip) for a dental check-up and cleaning, and stopped on the way home for a solo lunch under a big umbrella on a favourite downtown patio. Walking in sunshine consumes physical energy but replenishes mental, emotional, arguably even spiritual energy. Still, I had another nap when I got home. I thought about starting this post but instead had some items to tick off the ongoing to-do list of basic household admin. After which, I thought I deserved some knitting and reading time, so I took it.
But I’ve been missing you — today’s energy had to stretch to writing a post. First, though, a gruelling couple of hours booking flights for the fall. Ugh! I carefully put various options together and settled on the best, I got all the way to the final step of booking each flight and choosing seats for the two of us, only to have the itinerary vanish. Four times! I can’t even tell you how many times I waited for codes to be sent to my phone, then entered on the website — only to see it all crumble again. That’s okay; there was a 1-800 number for such eventualities; the young man on the other end was reassuring (it was obvious that the problems were systemic and not due to any techie failure on my part) and we were both patient; the reservation has been made. More on that later.
For now, I’ve written my way to the end of my indoor desk energy and need to get out into the sunshine for a walk before dinner (having scoffed at any notion of using energy to make dinner — we’ll sort something when Paul gets home ;-)) Not sure I’ve achieved the elusive coherence I strive for, but I’ve broken that over-a-week-without-writing streak and shifted some OOTD photos from files to your screen. I’m going to resist all temptation to edit and/or delete, and instead send this out to you, just as it is
Whether you’re a Nana or not, I’d love to hear how you grapple with your energy gaps. What trade-offs do you make? What differences do you notice in how you spend your energy now compared to when you were either younger or in different life circumstances? What are you willing to dispense with now to have time for what matters most? And how do you sort “Musts” from “Shoulds”? Comments section open below, thanks in advance!
May you find bottomless buckets-full of energy OR learn the wise squirrel’s ways and refill those buckets when you can,
xo,
f
As an also 70, I can definitely identify, though I’m amazed at how far you walk on a regular basis! It’s been quite awhile since we cared for grandchildren for more than a few hours at a time. I’m sure we could still do it, but like you, we’d definitely need to rest and conserve energy when we could.
Author
Retired and living right in the city, the walking distances don’t seem a big challenge, honestly. Easier than bothering with a.car, all that traffic and finding a parking spot!
You have way more energy than I do, Frances. All that lunch and snack organization would have worn me out. I’ve always been fairly low energy, needing my downtime, and my reading and nap time. Much to the chagrin of my mum when I was a lazy teenager. Ha.
Except when I was at school. As a teacher, not necessarily as a student. As a high school student I fell asleep every afternoon in Physics class. But I seemed to have boundless energy at school when I was teaching… always talking and leaping around with much flapping of hands. The instinct to entertain, I think.
Now I find I always make time for my book and a cup of tea. No matter what. Well, almost. 😊
P.S. I do love those green Stan Smiths, my dear. They look great with everything.
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I doubt that I have more energy than you, and my nap times are sacrosanct! Not sure how I managed without them through my teaching years (might have pulled a George Costanza-style snooze, once or twice, my office door closed after students’ Office Hours 😉
Aren’t those Stan Smiths good? Got them on a daughter’s advice and she was right — they do go with everything!
Your post came at just the right time for me, as I prepare for what we call ”Poppy Camp” (5+ days of having our two grandsons, cousins ages 5) followed by “Grammie Camp” (the same but with our two granddaughters, cousins ages 7 & 9). We do fun things like cooking & art projects (girls) and fighting bad guys (boys, sigh) and go to the beach for a few nights and read a million books, etc etc. Wonderful and exhausting in equal measure.
Like you I am 70 and marvel at the energy I once had raising 3 sons; I am taking note of your example to give myself grace and “time outs” in order to be the best Grammie I can be! I’m also rehabbing several injuries which sap my energy, which I find absolutely maddening. Luckily, as with your Paul, my “Poppy” is a true partner and terrific camp co-director. Although I’ll collapse when these 2 weeks are over I wouldn’t trade them for the world. My kiddos talk about “camp” all year long- focusing on them for a couple of weeks is a good trade off for ignoring all but required household tasks, etc. And a “quiet time” for EVERYONE every day for an hour is my lifesaver!
Author
Wow! I’m not sure I could manage back-to-back grandkid camps! I like the idea of having cousins together, which would avoid some of the sibling dynamics that can be tiring to manage. What wonderful memories you’re all making together and nurturing a bond between cousins.
Worth the exhaustion, absolutely! And retirement affords us the time to collapse, and then recover, afterward.
It’s amazing how much effort goes into life when everything is listed . I’ve never been a madly physical person & ( perhaps like Sue ) had to be prodded away from my book & made to move . We walked & walked in those days though as lifts in the car weren’t an option & that was a good habit to get into . I couldn’t abide any sporting activity then & can’t now . I do wonder if it is hard for sporty , competitive people as energy levels flag & painful niggles come along ? I accept my limitations now . I’m still gardening , walking etc but for shorter periods . I’m a little sad that , with age , I can’t pack as much into holidays .We would be on the go constantly , exploring & absorbing everything around us , full of curiosity & adrenaline . These days I have to pace myself . So it’s busy mornings of walks & sightseeing with more restful afternoons . We’re in Scotland again just now , having a lovely holiday but just a little nostalgic for more energetic times whilst telling ourselves we are still very fortunate & we “ mustn’t grumble “ – my mum’s favourite expression from WW2 .
Author
Wendy, you say you’re not really physical, but that garden of yours! I’ve never been sporty nor competitive nor confident in athletic endeavours (a bookworm from the get-go), but I like being able to move myself and have strength to carry whatever without getting injured. I won’t be joining any pickleball leagues any time soon 😉
Enjoy the rest of your time in Scotland, even nostalgia-tinged. . .
What a full-on week! Yes, parenthood is not for the faint-hearted. I think I feel retrospectively exhausted still at what we actually managed to do – both working full-time with 2 children in a city far from family. In fact we enjoyed the sum total of one night (ONE NIGHT) of grandparent-delivered childcare (or anyone else-delivered) during babyhood, childhood and still too young to be left alone adolescence. I may have mentioned this before! It’s only when I see how much help other parents had/have today that our soldiering on sinks in for me. Not too sure how we did it, but we did!
Now, at 63, I’m incapable of napping during the day – makes me feel cross and woozy and lacking in energy. I have a morning and afternoon tea break of about half an hour when I sit down and my husband and I chat, but apart from that I realise I’m on the go. Walking, gardening, cooking, muddling around in a still being renovated house. I still feel guilty if I sit down with a book during the day, as if there is some essential task that I have to do right now or everything will fall apart. Evenings are when I settle down to read. That tempo suits me – I feel I have structure and purpose and a well-deserved time of relaxation afterwards. Must be the Calvinist in me. Not sure my energy would hold up to the same extent if grandchildren were on the scene, but since there are none on the immediate horizon I’ll make the most of it.
Love all your outfits, but especially the pale jeans and olive green jumper and scarf.
Author
That’s a really long stretch (at least 18 years?!) to go without having more than one night to yourselves! We lived a two-day drive from both our families for seven years, but still managed a few days to ourselves most years. You have all my retrospective sympathy!
I’ll see your Calvinist guilt and raise my Catholic upbringing as eldest of a large family . . . but I have reading breaks in the morning and in the afternoon and the evening, and these days I try my best to cultivate a sense of luxurious indulgence after “observing” my guilt “with curiosity,” as my favourite French life coach says 😉
I’m sure your daughter in Rome has the same childcare respite syndrome – kudos to her for doing it all in another country.
The reason I’m working so resolutely is that I feel I have to get this garden cleared and made before I run out of energy to do all the hard physical work. A suspicion that around age 68 I may feel, “no, that’s too much for me”. I hope not, but still. The 60s are uncharted territory, which of course you’ve negotiated with what seems like lots of vim.
Author
Yes, she does — and even tougher when my son-in-law is away (he travels often for work). I so often wish I could just pop over to give her a break!
Smart to get as much of the garden done when you do have the energy. No guarantees at any age, really, that we’ll have the same fitness and mobility indefinitely. Plus you’re going to get so much enjoyment from it when it’s done (not that gardens are ever “done,” but you know what I mean).
I go to sleep or get in the bath where I sometimes fall asleep. It is a combination of physical tiredness and a need to shut myself off. A bit like C3PO in his rewarding oil bath. Too much of the world and other people makes me uncomfortable but 20 mins shut-down can fix that and I have been doing this for over 30 years now, it seems to work. Still have plenty of energy, just less…inclination. We are having humid and wet weather here today, a perfect excuse to do very little.
Author
My husband can fall asleep in a hot bath as well, which I find rather alarming, honestly. But I really relate to your recognition of this as a “need to shut yourself off.” Often with my afternoon nap, I just need to feel as if I’ve sunk down to that spot where consciousness loosens and then lets go — there’s almost a quiet “ping.” Even if it just lasts a few seconds, that space of letting go, it seems as if a re-set takes place and I’m renewed. Sometimes I can’t relax enough on my own, so I’ll listen to a guided 25-minute Yoga Nidra which does the trick! (makes up for being awake by 5-ish, right?)
Thanks for this collection of photos, they’re very inspiring! I need to get back in touch with my collection of summer scarves…
Re: energy, I had a day last week that included two 2-hour drives, and when I got home from the second one I was stiff and absolutely worn out! But there was a prescription to pick up at the drugstore, so I set off on foot, and when I got back — about 1.5 miles round trip — wouldn’t you know it, I felt peppier. Interesting to realize that the things that drain me and the things that energize me aren’t always what I would first assume.
Author
Such a good reminder — I find this true as well, and I think many of us forget how comforting and even rejuvenating the natural rhythm of walking can be. I heard someone say (to a group of fellow workshop participants who were commiserating about jet-lag and travel fatigue and trying to figure how they could sneak in a nap), “If you’re tired, go for a walk.” He was the Energizer Bunny type, but his prescription held wisdom nonetheless.
I’ll be 70 early next year. I definitely have less energy than 10 years ago. I have some joint issues and pain keeps me in touch with my physical limitations. I rest when I need to, but resting time can be reading time, or time to make plans for things I want/need to get done.
I can imagine that caring for young children would be very tiring. Your list of grandmotherly tasks reminds me of all the things I used to do when my daughter was small. It’s a lot, and I’m sure it’s very tiring but also very rewarding.
These days I dispense with, or contract-out, housework I no longer can or wish to do, or simply turn a blind eye to a growing pile of ironing, or walls that could do with a wash, but would make my shoulder sore for weeks on end.
So nice to see you looking happy and well in your summery outfits and excellent collection of walk-friendly shoes. Here it’s winter layers, warm socks and scarves, and at present, an umbrella for outings!
Author
Oh, I’m glad you mentioned the dismissal of housework. I save so much time this way with, I believe, no threat to our healthy or safety. Accepting “good enough,” leaving the vacuuming and the bathroom-cleaning and the grocery-shopping to my husband (and letting him do those his way) is huge in freeing up time for pursuits that interest or please me more.
You really spoke to me with this post. I had a similar driving experience a couple weeks ago…I didn’t make any wrong turns, but definitely felt some anxiety in unfamiliar territory. It is important to keep pushing for new challenges, even small ones. I wish I had your self-discipline, level of fitness, and ability to nap. Perhaps the self-discipline alone would do it! Ha! But seriously, you set an excellent example of how to get the most out of these later years.
Author
So I’m not the only one — I drive so much less now, living in the city, and it would be easy to let it go completely now except that I like to maintain that independence and it was the easiest way to be able to get from one place to another in time.
I love that you’ve put my supposed self-discipline together with my ability to nap — ha! Lovely! Thanks for the kind words!
As others have written, when you lay out the details of the time with your grandchildren and the daily requirements, it reminds me of when we raised our son while working full-time jobs. We were older parents, but not so old that we didn’t have the energy required. It feels daunting now. You were smart to rest when you could. One gets better at these tasks when they are part of the routine. They are a bit of a shock to the system when you tackle them once in a while.
I’m not a napper, except when I am sick. I have the same experience that Linda described. I tend to have an espresso break mid-afternoon and that picks me up.
I like the jeans with the green linen shirt and scarf. Great outfit.
I find that I push and push for days and then, even if there are lots of things left on my To Do list, I crash. I slow down, sit in front of the computer, work on sewing projects or knit. As inspired as I can be for long periods of time, I cannot sustain a physical push for as long as I would like. I’ve recently finished days of outdoor and cooking projects and I cannot make myself get on with the remaining ones. Guests recently left and I’m taking a break. I need a new deadline to inspire me.
Author
I’m intrigued by the way we’re differently wired, so that you and Linda (and many others, I’m sure) for example, feel woozy and out-of-sorts after an afternoon nap whereas Annie and I (and perhaps others of our ilk) only need a short nap to feel restored (although I’m not averse to a good long nap if I need it). And I can’t speak for Annie, but an espresso mid-afternoon is likely to make me feel more jangled than I want to be, ramps up the intensity of engagement which I need a break from.
Maybe you could set a challenge instead of a deadline — see how long a break you can give yourself, well-deserved after your hosting duties 😉
Coffee is definitely a morning thing for me. Two in the morning set me up to chunter along and then I tend to go for tea. As I am doing right now. An espresso in the afternoon would probably confuse my metabolism. Cannot, as my scouser husband would say, be arsed to do that now.
Challenge is a good idea. I may make some notes on possible challenges.
I understand avoiding the afternoon coffee. Looks like Anne is with you on that. It doesn’t phase me if I have it by 3:30. I don’t go to bed until after 11:00. That said, I rarely put the afternoon cutoff to the test. If I want an espresso after 3:30, it’s decaf. Whatever small amount of caffeine is in the decaf doesn’t bother me.
I tend to be a tea drinker in the colder months. Then it supplements my coffee drinking.
Author
Oddly, I enjoy an espresso after dinner when we’re in Italy, and it rarely keeps me awake. At home I almost exclusively drink tea.
Ah, the power of an afternoon nap! Love it…and your outfits!
Author
Yes! So many cultures know of its value (I love its Italian name, “pisolino,” such an affectionate-sounding word). I often think of the reference in Macbeth to sleep’s power to “knit up the ravell’d sleeve of care” and of a friend who regularly commented that sleep is “nature’s nurse.”
I’ve been spending time this summer driving back and forth to spend time in the smaller city where I grew up. Every time I get in the car (but it is a newer car only 15 years old ha!) it seems there are thunderstorm, hail or tornado watches. Prairie weather. If I wasn’t bred and born here it would make me extremely uneasy.
Eager to hear more about your planned travels. I booked an apartment in Florence for five weeks (with I think four weeks of Italian class) in late winter/early spring but won’t look at flights for a while. Fingers crossed.
Energy. I’m not sure. I think what I have is less an energy reduction than a marked increase of ‘I don’t want to and I’m not going to’. My calendar has been too full for comfort lately but next week will bring an enforced slow down with part one of the dental implants: bone graft. I had trauma to my front teeth years ago and it’s time for a permanent solution. No chewing, straws or exercise (increased heart rate) for two weeks. So…drugs, books and a good blender. And the anticipation of looking like a black and blue chipmunk for a period of time. Without the nuts and seeds. 🙂
Author
You’re going back to Italy — for more Italian classes! and Florence! Ma che bella!!
Good luck with the bone graft . . . This is definitely something for which I wish I didn’t have to expend energy (“I don’t want to and I’m not going to”). . . but needs must, and I suppose I’ll be glad enough of having done it, someday. . .
While having chemo and radiation, I learned about managing the accompanying, bone-deep fatigue. The app that I used was UnTire, for chemo pts. It taught me to recognize things that add to my vase of energy (a short nap, a walk, being in nature, doing needlework, enjoying a book, etc) and the things that used up my energy (walking the dog, social events, grocery shopping, cleaning, even having a shower when it was a really bad day). The part that I hadn’t thought about were the “leaks” from the bottom of the vase (a bad night of “what ifs?”, anxiety, having to support people around me who were anxious, etc). While that is all in the past now, I still consider where I am every day and realize that I don’t have the same energy level that I had before treatment and that’s ok. Im alive and fortunate to be able to hire a cleaner or get help in my garden and it also gives me the power to say, “sorry, I’m not up for that today, how about next week?”
Author
I do wonder how I’d ever manage what I’ve watched others go through with chemo and radiation — that demands so much of all kinds of energy. You’ll see Dottoressa refer to “spoons” in one of the comments here, because she and I have talked before about Spoon Theory, something you may have heard of. I like the idea of your app and the image of a vase of energy, especially this idea of the “leaks.”
I’m fortunate in generally still enjoying good fitness and health (quickly knocks on wood) but I recognize that aging occasionally means evaporation or leaking from that vase’s water level, beyond what I might have anticipated. Thanks for sharing your wise approach here.
I just went and read about the spoon theory and it’s pretty similar to the vase of energy except the vase analogy gave me ways to top up my daily energy level. Some of your readers commented about sitting with a book and a cup of tea or having a short nap. Those activities might be spoons that are handed back. For me, a half hour with needle and thread in hand was, and still is, a spoon that was handed back to me.
Author
Thanks for taking time to look up spoon theory and then compare it with the vase analogy. I like the focus of the latter on the possibilities for refilling, although I know there are some chronic conditions where that might not be an option. I’m lucky that a short nap gives me a spoon or two back. 😉
Adding my two cents. As I get older I find I really do have to manage my energy. I have even been considering getting a cleaning service to help manage my small but multi leveled home. Not weekly but to occasionally to do the heavy stuff. I do try to walk every day if possible, maybe do some yoga. as well. The other day my car needed urgent repair and I had to leave it at the repair shop. I was able to handle the walk home with no problem. Fortunately I was going out to lunch with friends who were able to drop me off afterwards. For years I found it impossible to nap during the day. Now I find that when I sit down to read a book in the afternoons I often dose off. I have to say, when I look at my contemporaries I feel very grateful. So many have mobility issues.
Author
Oh, I’ll throw you two cents back — Get the cleaning help! Why not? Save the energy for what you enjoy better and, especially, don’t risk injuring yourself doing the heavier stuff when you want to be your fittest self for as long as possible.
So glad your car problems didn’t leave you stranded — it’s reassuring to be able to walk our own selves home when we can 😉
I’m so amazed by everything you do,Frances! And you should be,too 🙂
I’ve found out today that my seamstress is 70! She looks like 55 years old,and has energy like 35-40 old woman
My spoons (from the theory of spoons)…. well,right now I’m envious of your squirrel!
Lovely outfits!
Dottoressa
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K, did you ask her secret?! 😉
I have been thinking of our spoons since I posted this — very relevant, even to those of us without chronic illness, especially once we’re in these years of great wisdom 😂
Isn’t that squirrel an inspiration!
Your vigor, deep-dive interests, physical recreation, travel passions, and amazing commitment to family always inspires me. Btw, the jeans and scarf jibe perfectly with my impression of you as a badass flâneur.
— Deborah
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Oh Deborah, I always love looking into the mirror you hold up for me. Thank you! (Badass flâneur — might have to get that on a t-shirt! 😉
What an interesting post. Silly of me, but I’d never really thought that I might have to conserve energy when with grandchild for a period–I just struggle on with caffeine…and chocolate. The problem is, that like several readers, I cannot take an afternoon nap. If I sleep, I feel groggy and headachey all day. I think I’m going to try some relaxation apps and just try to relax (if I can do that without falling asleep). I wish I had your baseline energy and stamina! Do you eat a certain way or take vitamins to maintain this?
Important question 🙂 : what is the gorgeous bag/purse you are wearing on the pic with Levis/linen top/multi-coloured scarf?
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If you don’t have to think about conserving energy when caring for or hanging out with a grandchild, your baseline energy and stamina is surely higher than mine!
If you’re looking for a relaxation app, I’ve been very happy with the free version of Insight Timer.
As for the bag, it’s the M0851 Half Moon Belt Bag. see it here (in Saffron, on sale).